Wake Up And Smell The THC Coffee
September 12, 2018
Wake And Bake With THC Coffee!
Wake Up! Or do you need a cup of Joe first to get the blood pumping? How about some coffee to get you up and some THC to get you high? With the legalization of Marijuana around the country, THC is being infused into just about anything you can ingest, huff, puff, or inhale! These new lines of THC coffees have me excited for many reasons, but two specifically.
- I love coffee.
- I love THC.
The list referenced above is a true story, believe it or not! A morning cup of Joe infused with some purple kush just might be the kinds of fuel my brain needs to get work done around here! It’s as natural as the earth itself and has plenty of health benefits to go along with it. We all know that coffee is a major source of anti oxidants, and if you didn’t know, full spectrum hemp oils are power house sources of nutritional value. Combine the two and you have a true mind, body, and soul experience that is sure to make the day great. Imagine waking up in the morning and brewing a Keurig coffee cup in an instant that’s a combination of caffeine and THC. That would be the most convenient dosage ever and I guarantee the community of cannabis consumers would sip that Joe fo sho!
There are already a ton of coffees on the market that have infused THC with the coffee bean and brewers everywhere are jumping at the bit to get in on the action. Here are a few companies that are stoning the competition!
• Koala Coffee
This cold brewed bottle of coffee infused goodness is enough to get the blood pump’n and the brain cells puff’n. This cold bottle of hippie brew comes with a 25g dose of THC to make the day the happiest it can be!
• Brew Budz – A Cannabiniers Brand
This brew and bud combo was built to be used in any of the pod friendly devices out there on the market. I’m talking k-cup style THC infused coffee. Coffee pods plus pot equal a pot of pot coffee. See where I’m going with this?
• Canyon Cultivation Coffee
This dose of dope infused brew consists of 10mg of THC and 100mg of caffeine. Talk about the perfect ratio! I like just enough THC to spark the mental, followed with enough caffeine to turn those creative thoughts into action. One without the other is like food without the salt, it just ain’t that good.
• House Of Jane Cannabis Coffee Pods
Another brand that is getting into the pod market, these pot infused pods are the perfect way to start your day. Most people have jobs, and jobs suck! A cup of this in the AM will surely make that shitty work day more manageable. For those of you with actual careers, this just makes everything better – see, this is for everyone!
• Pot O Coffee
Another play on the word game, thought I was first with the slick talk until I came across this brand. I can dig it, they are cool enough to create a brand of hand crafted infused cannabis coffee, I’m sure if I ever met the mastermind behind this batch of love we would end up blazing one over a cold brew.
• Therapy Tonics
I am a huge fan of all these tonics that have hit the market. I see them infused with various herbs and roots, but this hemp infused tonic is the chronic! They have a wide variety of flavors to offer, enough THC to get the gears of the mind in motion, and I like anything therapeutical, so this is a no brainer.
• Ganja Grindz
I like ganja, I like coffee, and I like to grind. Waking up and grind’n out my day has always been the way of this guy. Gimme some THC infused Ganja Grindz and my mindz ablaze in ways never known to folks. If you hire me, just don’t give me a drug test, because I will fail miserably.
Clogging Toilets At Rogers Centre
August 28, 2018
How A Blue Jays Game Turned Into A Plumbing Nightmare
I went up to Toronto August 3rd to catch the Blue Jays and Mariners game (results here) with my buddy. We are both fans of the Jays, in fact, we have been Toronto fans since the days of George Bell if that tells you anything! Anyway, whenever we are in Toronto we eat like kings and drink like fish, there is nothing healthy about that trip when we make it. The game was awesome, the Jays beat the Mariners 7-2 which gave us even more reasons to celebrate!
During the game though, my stomach started churning, and I had to take a dump bad. I can usually fight off the cramps and gurgles, but when I start sweating it’s time to make a dash to the can! My buddy knew what was up, we have been around each other long enough that when he saw that look on my face it was clear that I needed to get to the restroom immediately. I jumped out of my seat and walked to the restroom at a pretty decent pace. When I arrived there was a small line, I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it, or if I was going to just have to drop this load in my shorts and flush them down the toilet. As my turn was approaching, I could feel this thing turtle necking and trying to push its way out my bum. The sweat was pouring on hard, I had pitted out my shirt, and my forehead was dripping.
After standing for almost 10 minutes in line, I reached point of no return, I had a little slip and totally sharted. I couldn’t tell if it was visible yet from behind, so I just closed my eyes and waited for the next bathroom stall to open. Some old guy cam wondering out of the stall and I almost knocked him over trying to get in there before he even had a chance to get out. Once I entered the stall, I couldn’t get my drawers off quick enough, within seconds I was sitting on the toilet and letting loose. I’m pretty sure everyone in Rogers Centre heard the disaster that was taking place. After 15 minutes of toilet time, two flushes, and half gallon of sweat, I was ready to wipe up and get out of there. The only issue I had was the start stained underwear I had been wearing, I wasn’t about to pull those back up and watch the rest of the games with them on.
So, I made a beer influenced decision and decided that my compression underwear was thin enough to flush down the toilet. Ask me why I made that decision when I’m sober and couldn’t tell you, catch me with a few beers in me and ask and I’ll tell you I had no choice. Prior to flushing though, I wound the underwear up into something that resembled a rope, something that could easily slither it’s way through the Rogers Centre plumbing system and into the sewer lines. It was this intoxicated reasoning that led me to one of the most embarrassing plumbing disasters I have ever been a part of.
I twisted up the underwear and slid it into the toilet like a snake, I have had poops that resembled this so I figured I was safe. Once the underwear was pretty much out of site I decided to flush, what I should have done is just left it and let the next guy flush. I pushed down the handle and it was an experience that was lived out in slow motion. I could hear the water struggling to drain and watched it start to back up, as the water was backing up it was almost like it was sucking everything back out of the pipes and into the toilet bowl. The water was getting darker, toilet paper was resurfacing, and I was in a panic, what did I just do?
I tried to casually walk out of the stall, but that’s kinda hard to do when there are 20 people behind you trying to use that toilet. I waived it off as if I knew nothing about why the toilet was clogged, but as I turned the corner to wash my hands I heard someone say “hey, there is underwear in this toilet”. By this time the water was overflowing and the place was turning into a scene of chaos. They needed the best drain cleaning services in Toronto to clean that mess up. Hopefully they were able to reach a qualified plumber in time to get the toilet fixed before the 7th inning stretch.
I returned to my seat almost 40 minutes later only to see my buddy laughing hysterically at me. My shirt was soaked in sweat, my face red from embarrassment, and he knew it was time for a beer. We left the game early and headed over to the best pub in Toronto for some cold ones. Not sure I will ever return to Rogers Centre after that one.
Dating Girls In Oklahoma
August 7, 2018
Finding An Okie Chick To Date
If you just moved to Oklahoma and are having some issued finding a girl to date that’s not a Thunder fan, good luck! Seems every girl you cross paths with out there is screaming Westbrooks name even in the off season. It’s not like they ever won a championship, except when they were in Seattle and were playing as the Sonics, they got one then, but have never been good enough since being stolen from Seattle to make a legit run in the finals. Look, I’m not here to bash the team, I’m here to bash the girls I keep meeting that act like the team is the best thing to happen to basketball.
I was at an OKC bar last month on business and struck up a good conversation with you gal I would have considered dating material. She had a beautiful smile, held a solid conversation about a wide range of topics, could drink a few beers, and seemed like a genuine person. These are the kinds of people I enjoy meeting when I’m traveling, and since I frequent OKC I need to know where to find more chicks like this to date. She had some ideas she threw out there for a second date, she seemed real familiar with the area and live most of her life there. I’m a fan of culture and good food and it seemed she her finger on the pulse of the OKC food and art scene.
We committed to meet up the following weekend for a drink and night at the OKCMOA. We met up at a local brewery called the Anthem Brewing Company and threw back a few bottles of beer. It was just enough to get us both to open up and converse beyond the surface material we had been talking about. Some decent discussions about life, goals, and dreams. It was a cool hour spent at the brewery before we ventured off to the OKCMOA.
The OKCMOA is a pretty cool art museum downtown. They have local art pieces on display in addition to some rotating pieces that were making their way around the country. There was a cool women’s golf gallery that had some old golf clubs that were turned into an art piece. There were also some manakins on display that featured some very artistic throwback styles of old womens golf clothes. We both enjoyed the creativity at the museum, art is such a pleasure to observe with someone else that has an eye for it.
I gotta say after two dates I’m pretty impressed with this. Okie chick. We have so many things in common, laugh hard, and truly enjoy hanging out with each other. The second date we kissed goodbye at the end, I didn’t even try grabbing her tits, I enjoyed her company enough that I wasn’t willing to risk pissing her off over a boob squeeze. I will wait on that one. I head back to OKC in a few weeks and have another date lined up with her. Should be a good time, looking forward to hanging with my Okie Chick!
Time For Crossfit Fat Ass
August 4, 2018
Wake Up Fat Ass! It’s Crossfit Time!
Put the Twinkie and soda down fat boy, it’s time to Wake Up! and smell the coffee!! Life is short, not as short as your pecker, but it’s damn short! If you want this thing to end sooner than is natural keep eating junk and sitting on your ass, if you want to live a long healthy life you better start thinking about a few things that are going to make a difference in your timeline. One of those things is diet, the other is exercise. There are a dozen ways to skin a cat, the same goes with diet and exercise chunk-boy! You gotta find a diet that works for you, stop stuffing your face and learn about a little thing called eating in moderation. Thanksgiving is once a year, not weekly porker! When you add some exercise to those kind of eating habits you get results and those results I’m talking about is good health. So, now that we have the diet all figured out and you know that healthy foods in moderation are going to give you a better chance at living than your McDonalds diet you are currently hogging out on, it’s time to talk exercise. You can get buy walking the block, pumping the rusty weights in your folks backyard, or doing P90X in your basement, but if you want to make real strides you will join a gym. Getting into a gym and training in an environment where you can get support from the people there is gonna push you to get off your ass and play hard. You gotta get that heart rate pumping, sweat pouring, and body aching. Going half ass isn’t going to get you the results you need and want, so go hard or go home!
The hottest workout routine in town is Crossfit. Interval training has proven to be a successful way to lose weight and gain lean muscle. If you have never heard of it, or never tried it, you are in for a real surprise when you start throwing weight around and jumping from station to station with your fellow crossfitters. Now, like anything else there are gyms that do it and there are gyms that do it right! I have searched the web for legit resources about crossfit and found this resource about Boxing Inc Crossfit in Tucson and found that these guys are some of the most legit competitors in the country. Their team of crossfit competitors have been competing professionally regionally and around the country. You wanna lose some weight chunk? Join a gym like Boxing Inc and get some professional guidance as you navigate your way through the crossfit circuit. Once you are able to complete a circuit competitively, you can officially shed your title of fat ass and star calling yourself bad ass!
Balding In Sports
August 2, 2018
The Athlete And The Receding Hairline
Athletes are notorious for wearing caps and helmets during game time, at least in baseball and football. But there are plenty of non hat/helmet wearing athletes that fall victim to hair loss. Is that hereditary or are these guys rock’n hats in their off time. I’m not even really sure what causes hair loss to be honest, I just know that there are a lot of athletes that are walking around with half a head of hair. Football players have high receding hair lines and I can almost guarantee that it’s due to the helmets they have worn since high school. Baseball players are constantly wearing caps during the game and when in the outfield. But basketball players don’t wear any caps during the game and most of them are bald. I realize that for many it’s a style, but for the many others that don’t rock it as a style, the bald look is something they actually don’t want to be seen with. Many athletes trim up other areas of their body and go hairless on their tattooed arms, but the head is a whole other story. I’ve rocked long hair most of my life, so the crew cut style look has never really appealed to me. I can’t imagine that Lebron James is thrilled about his head of hair, or that any other basketball player that is losing his mop is happy about that. So what do you do? Sign up for an NBA hair transplant? If you are making millions playing sports I say fugettaboutit! You don’t need a head of hair to attract women. The massive bulge in your wallet should draw the attention of the finest babes in town, and if they aren’t attracted to you, just buy their love for a night, it’s a hell of a lot cheaper than falling in love! Hair loss among your average guy doesn’t seem as rampant as it does in professional sports. I know many guys on personal levels and business acquaintances that have full heads of hair, I know more guys with hair than without. So what does that say about all these balding athletes? Is it the supplements they are taking? Is it the constant hat wearing, keeping disguises 24/7 while in public? That has to wear away at the hair follicles on your head and leave your top short on hair. For those of you that wear hats on the daily and are noticing some thinning around the edges, wake up! If you don’t stop with all that hat wearing you will indeed lose your hair.
Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead
August 1, 2018
Brain Dead In Denver Doing Stuff
Remember that movie from the 90’s called Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead with Andy Garcia and Steve Buscemi? If not, check it out because it was a pretty slick flick! Anyway, I was in Denver last month visiting a buddy and we were definitely looking for things to do in Denver, brain dead! Yup, weed in legal now in Colorado, which makes Denver a place to waste your mind! Not only did we drink like fish, we smoked like chimney stacks and ate enough edibles to sedate an elephant. Denver was cool, we hung out near Coors field and drank Coors Light all night! That came after we drank local brews all day and needed to water down our blood streams. Switching to Coors Light after drinking IPA all day is really like switching to water. We had to sober up, so light beers and marijuana edibles were a great way to sober our minds and get ready for the night life. We started out around 4pm for some real bar hopping, that came after drinking at least 15 beers each and getting stoned off some Colorado Chronic. I’m not gonna lie, we were ripped when we set foot out onto the streets of Denver and it was nonsense from the get-go. We started talking smack the second we hit the street and almost got in a fight with some local thugs, my buddy stripped down to his underwear and these dudes wanted nothing to do with us. It was a pretty epic moment and we couldn’t stop laughing about it the rest of the night. We wandered by some store front properties and ventured through some of the stores, poking around at gadgets and random locally made goods. We came across an epic find when stumbled into Franks Denver Barbershop to buy some hair gel. We started drunk talking with the barber who ended up being a hell of a guy.
Buying Property In Rocky Point Mexico
August 1, 2018
Investing In a Vacation Property In Mexico
I like Rocky Point Mexico, you really can’t beat that trip to the sandy beach resort area. The beaches are beautiful, the sands are soft and powder like, the waters are blue, and the vibe is typically fun and entertaining. Rocky Point is a vacation destination for many families in the South West and the place starts to get real live during the holidays. The people show up there during the holidays to party, and the party is always live in Rocky Point. If you have never been there you are missing out on a great family vacation destination that is close to the border. It’s my preference to visit Mexico as close to the border as I can. Places like Cancun are a little deeper than I want to travel with my wife and kids. As a single guy I didn’t mind making the trip into the heart of Mexico, I have survived every situation thrown at me so far in life and the middle of Mexico didn’t bother me any, but traveling there with my family is a whole different story. That is why Rocky Point has been so appealing over the years. The real estate market there has been pretty affordable as the place has been developing over the last 15-20 years.
Wake Up And Smell The Cannabis
July 28, 2018
Wake Up – It’s Not A Dream – Weed Is Being Legalized
Stoners rejoice! Weed is being legalized around the country and we can finally puff some herb without having to duck the authorities. Back in Jr. High I was nabbed by campus security for blazing a J out in the woods just of the school property. This jack ass was creep’n through the woods off campus trying to bust us and he got me. Looking back though, dude was alright. He took my weed and gave us a big brother kinda talk and let us go, in those same woods in Washington State smoking weed is legal. Its about time they come around on this, alcohol has long been the governments poison of choice because of the complete control they have over it and the money they make taxing it. I think there is some fear that they can’t control this industry like they want, the FDA is working hard to make sure they create more monopolies, and that the small guys aren’t interfering with the crooked efforts of the real drug dealers in D.C. Enough of that rant though, we are living in a time were more government officials around the country are acknowledging that marijuana and CBD oils have some value in our society and shouldn’t be outlawed. People that use marijuana definitely shouldn’t be imprisoned over a sack a weed. Unfortunately there are people sitting in the bing as I type this that have been locked away over some weed smoke. That is an absolutely ridiculous though if you take a step back and think about what that statement says. Basically, if you burn and inhale the smoke of a plant that grows naturally on this earth then you are a criminal. Seriously? That is absurd, too much control over everything and big government will be wedging itself in the middle of this money making opportunity to ensure they control it all. Weed is being legalized in around the country and already is in Washington State, Oregon, Nevada, California, and Colorado.
There are other states on the east coast that have also joined the 420 club, I’ll make my way there eventually. One concern I have is that a company like Monsanto will takeover the cannabis industry by swooping in and getting pattens on weed seeds so that farmers are strong armed into buying GMO seeds from these monsters and the idea of smoking organically grown weed then becomes this commercialized product owned and controlled by companies like Monsanto. Hurry up and get your anti Monsanto t shirt here. My goal is to buy up as many marijuana seeds as I can and start a seed safe. Having a safe full of weed seeds will protect our future from the potential monopolized threat that big government poses on the industry. You can legally buy seeds in any of the states that have legalized marijuana. I took a drive to Boulder, Colorado and bought marijuana seeds from Helping Hands Dispensary and have kept them in my seed safe with some other collections I have purchased over the years. If we don’t wake up and smell the cannabis, we might find ourselves enjoying legalized marijuana in the commercially controlled environments that the government wants us in.
Hitchhiking To Titusville
July 27, 2018
My Journey To Titusville Florida
More Wakeup moments for you to enjoy. When I was young I was dumb and gave zero fucks about anything. I was living in Texas and working for a construction company doing random handyman gigs. I was living on the couch of a buddies place and was pretty broke for the most part. I had some cash stuffed in a shoe box, no bank account, and no property that I owned including a car. There were some friends in Florida that were having the time of their lives (according to their facebook profiles) and I made the decision to head out to Florida and maybe get a job at Disney World or something cool like that. Bartending was also on the radar, I was thinking Miami Beach and the night life there and sounded amazing. So that was the dream, head out to Florida, meet up with my friends, and become a bartender of the night life or a Disney World employee.
Hitching A Ride To Florida
I was going to grab a bus out to Florida but wasn’t sure if I could stand being on a bus with a bunch of freaks for hours and not having control over the journey. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, I had no car, so the bus was clearly the best option. Then the night before my departure I met these lesbian girls at Nepalese wedding. It was a strange encounter for sure, the feminine one in the relationship was beautiful, the man of the bunch was far less attractive, and yet I still caught myself undressing them both with my eyes and picturing them in action. They were also leaving for Florida except Miami was not part of their travel plans, they were heading to Titusville Florida to elope and find work. I knew they were making the drive so I followed them to their apartment that night to find out where they lived. My plan in the morning was to catch them on their way out of town with my thumb up. It sounds a little absurd, but it worked. I grabbed my bag in the morning and stood out on the street in front of their apartment and they took the bait. Oh, what a coincidence it is seeing you guys here, I’m on my way to Florida also, can I catch a ride? And that’s how I hitched a ride to Florida.
The drive wasn’t bad, the three of us hit it off like Threes Company and we covered ground pretty quick. There were a few stops to eat and pee, other than that we didn’t waste time stopping at any tourist destinations, we just plowed through like champs.
I had dreams of Miami, but the girls were destined for Titusville. Prior to them telling me about it I had never even heard of Titusville. These awesome ladies were nice enough to ask if I wanted to go in on a place with them and of course I wanted too. We ended up renting a house on a 1 year lease and the journey to find work began. Disney World was way out of the question and the bars in Titusville definitely didn’t have the appeal of those Miami bars I had seen online and in the movies. I jumped online and came across some job listings on the Titusville Craigslist page. I wasn’t interested in any labor jobs and the best thing I could find that paid a decent wage was a strip club out in the sticks. Well, that wasn’t appealing either. So I opted into trying my hand at labor. I replied to an ad from a Titusville roofing company that was offering $15 an hour for some shlep work and I jumped on it. I lasted about three months before the labor became too much for me. My hands were meant to pour drinks, take theme park tickets, and surf the internet. I was not meant to nail down shingles or pick up scraps around the ground of residential properties. Our stint in Titusville was short lived, we bailed out of there after the 1 year lease was over. I’m not sure what happened to the girls, they were definitely done with me and my perverted comments. I drove down to Miami and tried to get a job as a high profile bartender but never made it past bussing tables. Miami was a wild time, more great stories to share about my time in Miami, but I’ll save that for another time.
DUI On My 16th Birthday
July 27, 2018
I Got A DUI On My 16th Birthday
Well, this is a little embarrassing! I got a DUI on my 16th birthday. Yeah, my parents were kind enough to buy me a car when I turned 16 and like the snot nosed brat I was, I cared little about the people around me and how they would be impacted by my actions. What can I say though, I was 16 years old and had a good time on my mind and I just got a 4 door Subaru Legacy for my birthday. An AWD Subaru Legacy was an epic buy for a kid that spent most the time in the mountains of Washington State skiing during the winter. We were either at Stevens Pass or Snoqualmie Pass every weekend. The Subaru ran strong, had a roof rack, and I could pile 5 of us in there comfortably. Yeah, you could say that I had it made at the time but I didn’t realize it. Anyway, my parents handed me the keys to the Subaru the day I turned 16. I had been driving with a permit for the past year and was ready to own the roads in Washington State. We went to the DMV and took the test in the morning, I had my drivers license within an hour of passing the written exam and was driving my new Subaru Legacy around town like a boss. I stopped by my friends house to show off the new ride and couldn’t leave without smoking a bowl and having a beer. That’s just how we rolled at 16 years old. Puffing on ganja and drinking beer was already the norm by the time we were 15. At this point I had been smoking and drinking 2-3 times a week and didn’t think twice about it. I left there after a blunt and a beer and made another stop at my friend Travis’s house. His parents weren’t home and you know what that meant, we raided the fridge for beers and cleaned out his old mans stash in an hour. That was about 3 beers each. So now I’m 4 beers deep and high from the weed smoke and wondering if I should be driving. At that age in my life I was making all sorts of great decisions and decided that I was cool to drive. I jumped in the Legacy and continued on over to Tuckers house to show him my new wheels, I pulled the car into his garage where we often gathered to listen to music and get into trouble. He had a mini fridge in that garage that always had a few 40oz beers in there thanks to his older brother. He would buy us beer and we would get him weed in exchange for his efforts. It was a decent little connection we had at the time that was consistently available, which made us the goto guys on campus for scoring brews on the weekend. Well, we killed a 40oz each and rocked out to some Seattle grunge music in the car for an hour. Now I was feeling really good, I was playing air guitar, singing along to my favorite songs, and definitely should not have pulled out of that driveway. But I did what any normal 16 year old drunk would do at that time and I jumped in the drivers seat and pulled out of the garage like I had been drinking water all day. I made it about a mile down the road before I ran up a curb and blew out my front tire. The front alignment was thrown off, the tire balance destroyed, and the rim was damaged. I had hit a parked car also which is what the police were called. My parents had the car towed to an auto repair mechanic that was able to fix the front axle, correct the alignment, replace the rim, mount a tire and re-balance the wheel. I got a DUI but it was later reduced to a slap on the wrist and some community service. My folks grounded me for a month, couldn’t drive for two months, and they were in my face smelling my breath every time I came home for most of that school year. I didn’t stop drinking and driving, I just got better and managing my intake and covering the smell. Clearly it was time for me to Wake Up! I hope my kids never read this, I’m sure I am in for it sooner or later with at least one of them. Until then I will enjoy their innocence and share my life stories with the rest of you. Adios!
Keep Your Car Clean For The Ladies
July 22, 2018
How A Clean Car Can Get You More Ladies
Wake up fellas! Women don’t want to date a pig! If your room is a mess and you plan on taking her home for the night, you better spend some time getting the place picked up and smelling proper. Women have a keen sense of smell, your socks from the gym that have been on the floor all week will be one of the first things she notices. Get your spank rag off your night stand, put your shoes in your closet, make your bed, and prepare the place for some romance. All that and you still have to get her there. You gotta pick her up, take her out on a date, and invite her back and all of that revolves around your car. If you have a really nice car then good for you, if you keep up on the maintenance and keep it clean then good for you, if you don’t then wake up! No chick wants to climb into a car that looks like it’s being lived in. An interior and exterior car cleansing is a must for the first date. Get those empty beer cans out of the back seat, empty the roach clips out of the ashtray, and get those food wrappers out from under your front seat. If you have a stash of rubbers in the glove box, hide those! Let’s not be tacky here, you don’t want miss right digging through the glove box and finding a half empty box of cum stoppers chilling there. You gotta have class, you gotta play the part if you want the lady! Clean up your act you scumbag POS and get your ride looking like the transport vehicle she was born to be picked up in! You can wash your ride yourself if you have the time, or you can cough up some coin and hire an affordable car detailer to handle all the elbow grease for you. This depends on your work ethic, how much time you have, and how much you really care about impressing the girl of your dreams. Even if she’s not the girl of your dreams, maybe she’s just some 2buck slut, whatever the case you still need to have your car looking and smelling clean! Even hookers have a sense of smell, and if you thinking you’re getting some head in the front seat of stinky car from a semi-classy whore you’re dead wrong! Even they have boundaries! Don’t be a chump, if you wanna hump, make sure your car’s not a dump! Simple words of advise from Dr. Clean. Clean up your act, clean up your room, clean up your car and you might get some womb!
Bone Marrow Match Registry
July 21, 2018
Wake Up And Give Bone Marrow!
Time to wake up people and donate bone marrow. If you are donating blood you are doing a great job of contributing to the community that needs your help. People lose blood everyday and are in need of transfusions and there isn’t always available blood types so donors need to be more active about their contribution efforts. Even more importantly is the need to find more bone marrow donors. Patients all around the country are waiting for donors to step up and get swabbed. CBS News put out an article a few years back about “The Kindness of Strangers”. The article discusses the needs of the patients and also showcases stories of successful bone marrow transplants and how it has helped kids recover from rare cancers. Exact match bone marrow donors are needed for patients just like exact match blood types are needed for blood transfusions. Featured in that CBS article is the Gift of Life bone marrow match registry. If you are interested in getting swabbed and becoming a donor you can visit that website to register.
One of the first things you can do to become a bone marrow donor is to find a bone marrow match registry to submit DNA swabs too. The first part of the registration process is getting swabbed and finding out your donor type. Once you have registered and you have been swabbed you will be added to the donor registry to see if you are a match for anyone in need of a stem cell transplant. If you are a match then you will be contacted and the process will begin. This is where you can truly make a difference in your community and across the country.
Making A difference
If you ever wanted to make a difference but haven’t been sure about how to make that happen you have found the ultimate opportunity to not only make a difference, but to save lives. Blood cancer affects thousands of people in this country and the need for stem cell and bone marrow donations is greater than ever. Becoming a bone marrow transplant donor can truly make a difference in someones life. Make a difference today by finding a bone marrow match registry, getting swabbed, and getting registered to become a stem cell donor.
This Fart Guide Is A Must Read For Every Couple That Sleeps In The Same Bed
September 7, 2018
During the first phase of most romantic relationships, we try to look as desirable as possible, even if that means ignoring some of our bodily urges. Like, letting out a fart, for example. Sooner or later, however, most couples realize that there’s no need to blow against the wind and deny their biology, sharing their first fart. Weng Chen, the artist behind The Adventures of Messy Cow, thinks it’s perfectly normal, too. To highlight this, she has created a humorous fart guide for everyone who is sharing a bed with their significant other, and it might be more useful than you’d think.
“I ate all kinds of food and often ran into this problem,” Chen told Bored Panda. “I was curious how other people handled the situation but it’s a hard topic to bring up in casual conversations. So I decided to make a comic about it and <…> was happily surprised by how many people were open to this discussion.”
“Some couples can fart comfortably in front of each other after a week, some won’t do that after 50 years,” she added. “I think you should care about how it affects your relationship because you don’t want to make your partner dislike you, and it’s important you keep liking each other in a long-term relationship. I recommend using my comics as a guide and test it step by step. If your partner showed disgust at some point, don’t proceed further down the list.”
Weng is Chinese, but she’s fluent in English and visual language, too. She started drawing manga at a very young age and has been creating comics on-and-off since. In late 2016, she started the Messy Cow series.
More info: messycow.com | Facebook | tumblr | Twitter
25+ Times Nature Made Us Say “NOPE” (WARNING: This List Might Be Too Scary For You)
August 15, 2018
Spiderbro Guarding Me From Malaria Outside My Window
Xylaria Polymorpha, Commonly Known As Dead Man’s Fingers, Is A Saprobic Fungus
My Mum’s Toilet After A Recent Flood
Damn Nature, You Scary…
Wrap Around Spider, Named For Its Ability To Flatten And Wrap Its Body Around Tree Limbs
A Firefly Kept Right On Flashing After Being Eaten By A Frog
The Frog That Caught A Spider
Dolphin Caught A Squid, Trailing The Ink Behind It
My Gecko Ate His Tail
Those Fishes Are Literally Lit
All I Know Is That It Needs To Burn
Take A Seat
Black Swallower Died Trying To Eat A Fish 4 Times Its Size
These Plants Look Like Tiny Hands
5-Legged Frog That Lives In The Marsh Behind Our Neighborhood
The Skeleton Of A Puffer Fish Is Pretty Metal
The Clathrus Archeri Fungus Resembles Some Pretty Metal Tentacles Sprouting From An Alien Egg When It Blooms
Snapdragon Seed Pods Look Like Skulls
This Snake Covered In Ticks
A Mother Whip Spider Carrying Her Babies On Her Back
This Is A Hammerhead Bat And Is By Far The Creepiest Animal I’ve Seen
This Is Why You Always Have To Check The Toilet In Australia
The Eyes And Teeth Of A Scallop
The Giant Isopod, Found In The Deep Seas And Is An Example Of Deep-Sea Gigantism
Close Up Of Moth Outside My Window
These New Fish Species Can Survive In Volcanoes And They’re The Stuff Of Nightmares
Seaweed In The Waves
Attack Of Legionary Ants (Also Known As Army Ants Or Marabunta) To A Wasp Honeycomb
Acid Spitting Ants
This Coyote Froze Solid During The Recent Winter Storm (Pine Barrens, Southern New Jersey)
Currently Renovating Our Floors. Seems Everyone Has Come Out Of Hiding
The Lamprey Fish
The Inside Of A Gooses Mouth
A Lizard On Its Final Journey
My Inlaws Are In A Bit Of A Froggy Situation Right Now
My Dad Sent Me This Photo. Water Mocassin? Tennessee
A Jungle Perch With A Surprise
Oregon Fires Next To A Golf Course
Millions Of Fire Ants Floating In Flooding From Harvey
Eels In The Stream At Battle Hill Farm
Something Crawled Through The Keyhole And Made A Hive In The Garage Door Handle
This Hornets Nest Looks Kind Of Like A Hornet’s Head
Found Out The House We Are Living In Has A Bunker Below. I Managed To Squeeze My Phone In One Of The Cracks Of The Door To Take This Creepy Picture
Deer Skull After Sitting In Water For Over A Year
A Leopard Seal Peering Through A Veil Of Plankton
A Lizard Eating A Cockroach Alive At My House Porch
After A Weekend Storm In New England, A Puffer Fish Was Found In A Tree
G’day Mates, Let’s Be Friendssss!
The Largest Scar You’ll Ever See
When Mozilla Freezes
These Ants Forming A Question Mark
Sweet Potato Creepily Resembles Human Heart
This Frog Was Found All Dried Up And Withered Outside The Store In The Morning… The Store Manager Said, “Let’s Try Splashing Some Water On It,” And Holy Sh*t It Came Back To Life
So My Friend Got Something In His Eye While We Were Walking Home
Found In Mexico. Battle To The Death
Articulated Cobra Skeleton
One Big Spider
Thousands Of Mosquitos Outside Of My Window At Work
Something Took Two Clean Bites Out Of This Poor Sea Ravioli
Chameleon Mummified Alive By The Tropical Sun
The Statue Being Swallowed By A Tree
This Sick Washed Up Gar Skeleton I Found
Goliath Tiger Fish, Congo River
This Spider Web That Looks Like A Spider-Man Mask
Found An Icicle Held Only By A Spider’s Web
Fireants Create A Floating Island Of Themselves To Ride Out The Houston Flooding
My Aunt Found A Coyote Frozen Solid Standing Upright On Her Property
The Fox And The Hound
Ant On My Porch Carrying The Head Of His Vanquished Enemy
Beaver Frozen In A Lake