Time For Crossfit Fat Ass

Wake Up Fat Ass! It’s Crossfit Time!


Put the Twinkie and soda down fat boy, it’s time to Wake Up! and smell the coffee!! Life is short, not as short as your pecker, but it’s damn short! If you want this thing to end sooner than is natural keep eating junk and sitting on your ass, if you want to live  a long healthy life you better start thinking about a few things that are going to make a difference in your timeline. One of those things is diet, the other is exercise. There are a dozen ways to skin a cat, the same goes with diet and exercise chunk-boy! You gotta find a diet that works for you, stop stuffing your face and learn about a little thing called eating in moderation. Thanksgiving is once a year, not weekly porker! When you add some exercise to those kind of eating habits you get results and those results I’m talking about is good health. So, now that we have the diet all figured out and you know that healthy foods in moderation are going to give you a better chance at living than your McDonalds diet you are currently hogging out on, it’s time to talk exercise. You can get buy walking the block, pumping the rusty weights in your folks backyard, or doing P90X in your basement, but if you want to make real strides you will join a gym. Getting into a gym and training in an environment where you can get support from the people there is gonna push you to get off your ass and play hard. You gotta get that heart rate pumping, sweat pouring, and body aching. Going half ass isn’t going to get you the results you need and want, so go hard or go home!

The hottest workout routine in town is Crossfit. Interval training has proven to be a successful way to lose weight and gain lean muscle. If you have never heard of it, or never tried it, you are in for a real surprise when you start throwing weight around and jumping from station to station with your fellow crossfitters. Now, like anything else there are gyms that do it and there are gyms that do it right! I have searched the web for legit resources about crossfit and found this resource about Boxing Inc Crossfit in Tucson and found that these guys are some of the most legit competitors in the country. Their team of crossfit competitors have been competing professionally regionally and around the country. You wanna lose some weight chunk? Join a gym like Boxing Inc and get some professional guidance as you navigate your way through the crossfit circuit. Once you are able to complete a circuit competitively, you can officially shed your title of fat ass and star calling yourself bad ass!

Balding In Sports

The Athlete And The Receding Hairline

balding men in sports

Athletes are notorious for wearing caps and helmets during game time, at least in baseball and football. But there are plenty of non hat/helmet wearing athletes that fall victim to hair loss. Is that hereditary or are these guys rock’n hats in their off time. I’m not even really sure what causes hair loss to be honest, I just know that there are a lot of athletes that are walking around with half a head of hair. Football players have high receding hair lines and I can almost guarantee that it’s due to the helmets they have worn since high school. Baseball players are constantly wearing caps during the game and when in the outfield. But basketball players don’t wear any caps during the game and most of them are bald. I realize that for many it’s a style, but for the many others that don’t rock it as a style, the bald look is something they actually don’t want to be seen with. Many athletes trim up other areas of their body and go hairless on their tattooed arms, but the head is a whole other story. I’ve rocked long hair most of my life, so the crew cut style look has never really appealed to me. I can’t imagine that Lebron James is thrilled about his head of hair, or that any other basketball player that is losing his mop is happy about that. So what do you do? Sign up for an NBA hair transplant? If you are making millions playing sports I say fugettaboutit! You don’t need a head of hair to attract women. The massive bulge in your wallet should draw the attention of the finest babes in town, and if they aren’t attracted to you, just buy their love for a night, it’s a hell of a lot cheaper than falling in love! Hair loss among your average guy doesn’t seem as rampant as it does in professional sports. I know many guys on personal levels and business acquaintances that have full heads of hair, I know more guys with hair than without. So what does that say about all these balding athletes? Is it the supplements they are taking? Is it the constant hat wearing, keeping disguises 24/7 while in public? That has to wear away at the hair follicles on your head and leave your top short on hair. For those of you that wear hats on the daily and are noticing some thinning around the edges, wake up! If you don’t stop with all that hat wearing you will indeed lose your hair.

Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead

Brain Dead In Denver Doing Stuff

downtown Denver colorado

union station

Remember that movie from the 90’s called Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead with Andy Garcia and Steve Buscemi? If not, check it out because it was a pretty slick flick! Anyway, I was in Denver last month visiting a buddy and we were definitely looking for things to do in Denver, brain dead! Yup, weed in legal now in Colorado, which makes Denver a place to waste your mind! Not only did we drink like fish, we smoked like chimney stacks and ate enough edibles to sedate an elephant. Denver was cool, we hung out near Coors field and drank Coors Light all night! That came after we drank local brews all day and needed to water down our blood streams. Switching to Coors Light after drinking IPA all day is really like switching to water. We had to sober up, so light beers and marijuana edibles were a great way to sober our minds and get ready for the night life. We started out around 4pm for some real bar hopping, that came after drinking at least 15 beers each and getting stoned off some Colorado Chronic. I’m not gonna lie, we were ripped when we set foot out onto the streets of Denver and it was nonsense from the get-go. We started talking smack the second we hit the street and almost got in a fight with some local thugs, my buddy stripped down to his underwear and these dudes wanted nothing to do with us. It was a pretty epic moment and we couldn’t stop laughing about it the rest of the night. We wandered by some store front properties and ventured through some of the stores, poking around at gadgets and random locally made goods. We came across an epic find when stumbled into Franks Denver Barbershop to buy some hair gel. We started drunk talking with the barber who ended up being a hell of a guy.


They offered us a drink which was a great way to get our attention, apparently they pour drinks for their clients while they get trimmed up. Me and my buddy are both beard guys, obnoxious beard guys and don’t trim these facial bushes often. This guy was able to slip us some bourbon and and convince us that we needed an annual trim. We both took him up on it and slid into the barbers chair for a quick trim. I actually dozed off while getting cleaned up, the bourbon pour was stiffer than John Holmes and hit me like a hook from Mike Tyson. Word on the streets of Denver (actually just among those of us there) I may have even been snoring while I was in the barbers chair. That’s common when I drink all day and smoke weed, the pass out threshold creeps up quick and I can find myself unconscious in the most awkward places. While I was brain dead in a Denver barbershop, I had vivid dreams of dildos buzzing in my face and can now attribute that to the buzzing sound of the barber clippers. I cleaned up pretty well, still rock’n a mountain mans beard, just with less straggles and scrappy looking hair patches. When the barber finished he yelled Wake Up! in my face and I jumped up out the barbers chair like a bat outta hell. Next time we are brain dead in Denver looking for some time to kill with those brain cells, we will be swinging by that barbershop for some bourbon and a trim! Til next time Denver!

Buying Property In Rocky Point Mexico

Investing In a Vacation Property In Mexico

property management company

I like Rocky Point Mexico, you really can’t beat that trip to the sandy beach resort area. The beaches are beautiful, the sands are soft and powder like, the waters are blue, and the vibe is typically fun and entertaining. Rocky Point is a vacation destination for many families in the South West and the place starts to get real live during the holidays. The people show up there during the holidays to party, and the party is always live in Rocky Point. If you have never been there you are missing out on a great family vacation destination that is close to the border. It’s my preference to visit Mexico as close to the border as I can. Places like Cancun are a little deeper than I want to travel with my wife and kids. As a single guy I didn’t mind making the trip into the heart of Mexico, I have survived every situation thrown at me so far in life and the middle of Mexico didn’t bother me any, but traveling there with my family is a whole different story. That is why Rocky Point has been so appealing over the years. The real estate market there has been pretty affordable as the place has been developing over the last 15-20 years.


The condo projects are absolutely gorgeous and  we have thought about investing in one as a vacation property that we could rent throughout the year. The other option is buying a home either on the beach or buying a home just off the beach. Vacation properties have always been alluring to me as an investor, especially with places like VRBO and Air B&B out there giving me the opportunity to rent the property out to people traveling. The only issue I would have with a property in Mexico is managing it. After every vacation rental, someone would need to go in and clean the place to prepare it for the next family. If the property was here in the states we would have the same issue, except that we would probably purchase in state to make sure that we could have eyes on the property. Mexico does have some cleaning services and local maid services that could work but I would rather hire a property management company that has a local reputation for managing properties for American investments. There are a 100 reasons why I would hire a property manager as opposed to just hiring a maid service, even if the costs are substantially more than a maid service I think the level of accountability that a property management has to adhere to puts them at another level of trust than a maid service. If we do buy a vacation property in Mexico, we will probably connect with local American investors to see who they use to manage their properties and go with whatever makes sense. Rocky Point is a party hub, so vetting prospect renters will be key to making sure the lace doesn’t get trashed. Better Wake Up folks, the only thing getting trashed in my rental property will be me!

Wake Up And Smell The Cannabis

Wake Up – It’s Not A Dream – Weed Is Being Legalized

colorado girl getting highStoners rejoice! Weed is being legalized around the country and we can finally puff some herb without having to duck the authorities. Back in Jr. High I was nabbed by campus security for blazing a J out in the woods just of the school property. This jack ass was creep’n through the woods off campus trying to bust us and he got me. Looking back though, dude was alright. He took my weed and gave us a big brother kinda talk and let us go, in those same woods in Washington State smoking weed is legal. Its about time they come around on this, alcohol has long been the governments poison of choice because of the complete control they have over it and the money they make taxing it. I think there is some fear that they can’t control this industry like they want, the FDA is working hard to make sure they create more monopolies, and that the small guys aren’t interfering with the crooked efforts of the real drug dealers in D.C. Enough of that rant though, we are living in a time were more government officials around the country are acknowledging that marijuana and CBD oils have some value in our society and shouldn’t be outlawed. People that use marijuana definitely shouldn’t be imprisoned over a sack a weed. Unfortunately there are people sitting in the bing as I type this that have been locked away over some weed smoke. That is an absolutely ridiculous though if you take a step back and think about what that statement says. Basically, if you burn and inhale the smoke of a plant that grows naturally on this earth then you are a criminal. Seriously?  That is absurd, too much control over everything and big government will be wedging itself in the middle of this money making opportunity to ensure they control it all. Weed is being legalized in around the country and already is in Washington State, Oregon, Nevada, California, and Colorado.

There are other states on the east coast that have also joined the 420 club, I’ll make my way there eventually. One concern I have is that a company like Monsanto will takeover the cannabis industry by swooping  in and getting pattens on weed seeds so that farmers are strong armed into buying GMO seeds from these monsters and the idea of smoking organically grown weed then becomes this commercialized product owned and controlled by companies like Monsanto. Hurry up and get your anti Monsanto t shirt here. My goal is to buy up as many marijuana seeds as I can and start a seed safe. Having a safe full of weed seeds will protect our future from the potential monopolized threat that big government poses on the industry. You can legally buy seeds in any of the states that have legalized marijuana. I took a drive to Boulder, Colorado and bought marijuana seeds from Helping Hands Dispensary and have kept them in my seed safe with some other collections I have purchased over the years. If we don’t wake up and smell the cannabis, we might find ourselves enjoying legalized marijuana in the commercially controlled environments that the government wants us in.

Hitchhiking To Titusville

My Journey To Titusville Florida

moving to TitusvilleMore Wakeup moments for you to enjoy. When I was young I was dumb and gave zero fucks about anything. I was living in Texas and working for a construction company doing random handyman gigs. I was living on the couch of a buddies place and was pretty broke for the most part. I had some cash stuffed in a shoe box, no bank account, and no property that I owned including a car. There were some friends in Florida that were having the time of their lives (according to their facebook profiles) and I made the decision to head out to Florida and maybe get a job at Disney World or something cool like that. Bartending was also on the radar, I was thinking Miami Beach and the night life there and sounded amazing. So that was the dream, head out to Florida, meet up with my friends, and become a bartender of the night life or a Disney World employee.

Hitching A Ride To Florida

hitchhiking to TitusvilleI was going to grab a bus out to Florida but wasn’t sure if I could stand being on a bus with a bunch of freaks for hours and not having control over the journey. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, I had no car, so the bus was clearly the best option. Then the night before my departure I met these lesbian girls at Nepalese wedding. It was a strange encounter for sure, the feminine one in the relationship was beautiful, the man of the bunch was far less attractive, and yet I still caught myself undressing them both with my eyes and picturing them in action. They were also leaving for Florida except Miami was not part of their travel plans, they were heading to Titusville Florida to elope and find work. I knew they were making the drive so I followed them to their apartment that night to find out where they lived. My plan in the morning was to catch them on their way out of town with my thumb up. It sounds a little absurd, but it worked. I grabbed my bag in the morning and stood out on the street in front of their apartment and they took the bait. Oh, what a coincidence it is seeing you guys here, I’m on my way to Florida also, can I catch a ride? And that’s how I hitched a ride to Florida.

The Drive

driving The drive wasn’t bad, the three of us hit it off like Threes Company and we covered ground pretty quick. There were a few stops to eat and pee, other than that we didn’t waste time stopping at any tourist destinations, we just plowed through like champs.

Titusville Florida

I had dreams of Miami, but the girls were destined for Titusville. Prior to them telling me about it I had never even heard of Titusville. These awesome ladies were nice enough to ask if I wanted to go in on a place with them and of course I wanted too. We ended up renting a house on a 1 year lease and the journey to find work began. Disney World was way out of the question and the bars in Titusville definitely didn’t have the appeal of those Miami bars I had seen online and in the movies. I jumped online and came across some job listings on the Titusville Craigslist page. I wasn’t interested in any labor jobs and the best thing I could find that paid a decent wage was a strip club out in the sticks. Well, that wasn’t appealing either. So I opted into trying my hand at labor. I replied to an ad from a Titusville roofing company that was offering $15 an hour for some shlep work and I jumped on it. I lasted about three months before the labor became too much for me. My hands were meant to pour drinks, take theme park tickets, and surf the internet. I was not meant to nail down shingles or pick up scraps around the ground of residential properties. Our stint in Titusville was short lived, we bailed out of there after the 1 year lease was over. I’m not sure what happened to the girls, they were definitely done with me and my perverted comments. I drove down to Miami and tried to get a job as a high profile bartender but never made it past bussing tables. Miami was a wild time, more great stories to share about my time in Miami, but I’ll save that for another time.

DUI On My 16th Birthday

I Got A DUI On My 16th Birthday

repairs being made on SubaruWell, this is a little embarrassing! I got a DUI on my 16th birthday. Yeah, my parents were kind enough to buy me a car when I turned 16 and like the snot nosed brat I was, I cared little about the people around me and how they would be impacted by my actions. What can I say though, I was 16 years old and had a good time on my mind and I just got a 4 door Subaru Legacy for my birthday. An AWD Subaru Legacy was an epic buy for a kid that spent most the time in the mountains of Washington State skiing during the winter. We were either at Stevens Pass or Snoqualmie Pass every weekend. The Subaru ran strong, had a roof rack, and I could pile 5 of us in there comfortably. Yeah, you could say that I had it made at the time but I didn’t realize it. Anyway, my parents handed me the keys to the Subaru the day I turned 16. I had been driving with a permit for the past year and was ready to own the roads in Washington State. We went to the DMV and took the test in the morning, I had my drivers license within an hour of passing the written exam and was driving my new Subaru Legacy around town like a boss. I stopped by my friends house to show off the new ride and couldn’t leave without smoking a bowl and having a beer. That’s just how we rolled at 16 years old. Puffing on ganja and drinking beer was already the norm by the time we were 15. At this point I had been smoking and drinking 2-3 times a week and didn’t think twice about it. I left there after a blunt and a beer and made another stop at my friend Travis’s house. His parents weren’t home and you know what that meant, we raided the fridge for beers and cleaned out his old mans stash in an hour. That was about 3 beers each. So now I’m 4 beers deep and high from the weed smoke and wondering if I should be driving. At that age in my life I was making all sorts of great decisions and decided that I was cool to drive. I jumped in the Legacy and continued on over to Tuckers house to show him my new wheels, I pulled the car into his garage where we often gathered to listen to music and get into trouble. He had a mini fridge in that garage that always had a few 40oz beers in there thanks to his older brother. He would buy us beer and we would get him weed in exchange for his efforts. It was a decent little connection we had at the time that was consistently available, which made us the goto guys on campus for scoring brews on the weekend. Well, we killed a 40oz each and rocked out to some Seattle grunge music in the car for an hour. Now I was feeling really good, I was playing air guitar, singing along to my favorite songs, and definitely should not have pulled out of that driveway. But I did what any normal 16 year old drunk would do at that time and I jumped in the drivers seat and pulled out of the garage like I had been drinking water all day. I made it about a mile down the road before I ran up a curb and blew out my front tire. The front alignment was thrown off, the tire balance destroyed, and the rim was damaged. I had hit a parked car also which is what the police were called. My parents had the car towed to an auto repair mechanic that was able to fix the front axle, correct the alignment, replace the rim, mount a tire and re-balance the wheel. I got a DUI but it was later reduced to a slap on the wrist and some community service. My folks grounded me for a month, couldn’t drive for two months, and they were in my face smelling my breath every time I came home for most of that school year. I didn’t stop drinking and driving, I just got better and managing my intake and covering the smell. Clearly it was time for me to Wake Up! I hope my kids never read this, I’m sure I am in for it sooner or later with at least one of them. Until then I will enjoy their innocence and share my life stories with the rest of you. Adios!

Keep Your Car Clean For The Ladies

How A Clean Car Can Get You More Ladies

girl detailing car

Wake up fellas! Women don’t want to date a pig! If your room is a mess and you plan on taking her home for the night, you better spend some time getting the place picked up and smelling proper. Women have a keen sense of smell, your socks from the gym that have been on the floor all week will be one of the first things she notices. Get your spank rag off your night stand, put your shoes in your closet, make your bed, and prepare the place for some romance. All that and you still have to get her there. You gotta pick her up, take her out on a date, and invite her back and all of that revolves around your car. If you have a really nice car then good for you, if you keep up on the maintenance and keep it clean then good for you, if you don’t then wake up! No chick wants to climb into a car that looks like it’s being lived in. An interior and exterior car cleansing is a must for the first date. Get those empty beer cans out of the back seat, empty the roach clips out of the ashtray, and get those food wrappers out from under your front seat. If you have a stash of rubbers in the glove box, hide those! Let’s not be tacky here, you don’t want miss right digging through the glove box and finding a half empty box of cum stoppers chilling there. You gotta have class, you gotta play the part if you want the lady! Clean up your act you scumbag POS and get your ride looking like the transport vehicle she was born to be picked up in! You can wash your ride yourself if you have the time, or you can cough up some coin and hire an affordable car detailer to handle all the elbow grease for you. This depends on your work ethic, how much time you have, and how much you really care about impressing the girl of your dreams. Even if she’s not the girl of your dreams, maybe she’s just some 2buck slut, whatever the case you still need to have your car looking and smelling clean! Even hookers have a sense of smell, and if you thinking you’re getting some head in the front seat of stinky car from a semi-classy whore you’re dead wrong! Even they have boundaries! Don’t be a chump, if you wanna hump, make sure your car’s not a dump! Simple words of advise from Dr. Clean. Clean up your act, clean up your room, clean up your car and you might get some womb!

Bone Marrow Match Registry

Wake Up And Give Bone Marrow!

bone marrow donation process

Time to wake up people and donate bone marrow. If you are donating blood you are doing a great job of contributing to the community that needs your help. People lose blood everyday and are in need of transfusions and there isn’t always available blood types so donors need to be more active about their contribution efforts. Even more importantly is the need to find more bone marrow donors. Patients all around the country are waiting for donors to step up and get swabbed. CBS News put out an article a few years back about “The Kindness of Strangers”. The article discusses the needs of the patients and also showcases stories of successful bone marrow transplants and how it has helped kids recover from rare cancers. Exact match bone marrow donors are needed for patients just like exact match blood types are needed for blood transfusions. Featured in that CBS article is the Gift of Life bone marrow match registry. If you are interested in getting swabbed and becoming a donor you can visit that website to register.

Get Swabbed

mouth swab kit

One of the first things you can do to become a bone marrow donor is to find a bone marrow match registry to submit DNA swabs too. The first part of the registration process is getting swabbed and finding out your donor type. Once you have registered and you have been swabbed you will be added to the donor registry to see if you are a match for anyone in need of a stem cell transplant. If you are a match then you will be contacted and the process will begin. This is where you can truly make a difference in your community and across the country.

Making A difference

make a difference

If you ever wanted to make a difference but haven’t been sure about how to make that happen you have found the ultimate opportunity to not only make a difference, but to save lives. Blood cancer affects thousands of people in this country and the need for stem cell and bone marrow donations is greater than ever. Becoming a bone marrow transplant donor can truly make a difference in someones life. Make a difference today by finding a bone marrow match registry, getting swabbed, and getting registered to become a stem cell donor.

This Restaurant Gives A Gift With Each Meal, And Nerds Love It

Back in 1970, a restaurant called ‘Traveler’ opened its doors, offering not only delicious meals but books that you can take home with you for free. Sounds unbelievable, right? Who on earth would give away stuff for free? Well, as it turns out, the creator of this lovely little restaurant was a huge book lover, and after his house got completely filled with books, he decided to give most of them to his restaurant’s customers.

In 1993, the owners of the restaurant changed, but they continued this beautiful tradition and even made it bigger. “We give away 1 to 2 thousand books a week. We have expanded it to three books per person. The books come from many sources. Library book sales are our best but our customers are a very big contributing factor, not a single day goes by that someone doesn’t bring us books. We have given away approximately 2.5 million books since we have been here.” The owner told Bored Panda.

Yes, you heard it right, over 2 million books, and they are not planning to stop! “We have a horse trailer that we pick up books with. Some weeks we can go to 4 different libraries to pick up books. There is about 9 thousand books on our shelves for them to choose from.”

Scroll down to see the restaurant yourself!

More info: Traveler Restaurant

Back in 1970 a restaurant ‘Traveler’ has opened its doors, offering not only delicious meals but also free books that you can take home with you

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (1)

Image credits: Nancy O

The founder, who’s a huge book lover, decided to give them to his restaurant’s costumers, since his house was completely filled up

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (2)

Image credits: Dean_Amy

In 1993 the owners of this restaurant have changed but they continued this beautiful tradition, and even made it bigger

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (7)

Image credits: Nancy O

“We give away 1 to 2 thousand books a week. We have expanded it to three books per person”

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (4)

Image credits: Zuckie

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (10)

Image credits: miss1ss1pp1 

“We have given away approximately 2.5 million books since we have been here”

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (5)

Image credits: BrowsingRoadside

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (9)

Image credits: miss1ss1pp1 

“There is about 9 thousand books on our shelves for them to choose from”

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (3)

Image credits: Lionel

Turns out, many people have already visited this lovely restaurant, and here’s what they had to say

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (7)

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (1)

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (5)

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (3)

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (6)

free-books-traveler-restaurant-connecticut (2)